Understanding Trauma
In the world of trauma care and support, “big T and little t trauma” are viewed in a synonymous way. All trauma is valid. “Big T” is defined as significant events like a natural disaster, violence, or war. “Little t” is used to describe events on a smaller scale such as a parent with a mental health disorder, bullying, loss of a job, or financial struggles. What if someone experiences “little t trauma” repeatedly? Over time, the smaller cuts produce unseen wounds. If left unchecked, death by 1,000 paper cuts create an infection. How long do you wait to visit the doctor or ER, before you treat a spreading infection in your body? Trauma requires careful evaluation, as both “big or little t” needs keen attention and sometimes extensive support due to PTSD (Post Traumatic Stress Disorder). Viewed through the lens of the person’s family system, experiences, and personality, the individual needs to be able to express their narrative and feel heard.
Another area worth exploring and understanding is what happens in the brain. When trauma occurs, the prefrontal cortex portion of the brain shuts down. Victims experience hyper or hypo arousal. Such a state prevents rational thinking but instead provides self-preservation, safeguarding the victim. The amygdala, connected to emotions and fear, sounds an alarm to protect too. Unfortunately, after trauma, the alarm may continue to go off, long after the threat, leading to mental health problems like PTSD.
During a perceived physical or psychological threat, stress activates a response. For safety, the nervous system responds with flight, fight, freeze, or fawn/fold. Flight or fight is a hyper-arousal response, while freeze or fawn/fold falls under hypo-arousal. Hyper-arousal is categorized as an anxious, panicky state. Hypo-arousal shows up as a paralyzed, unable to respond, numb feeling.
Because of the trauma, victims may find themselves struggling to stay in a balanced place called the Window of Tolerance. Everyone experiences hyper or hypo arousal from time to time, but trauma may cause you to stay stuck in unbalanced states for longer periods of time. People with significant trauma in their lives may live in hyper or hypo, unable to emotionally regulate.
One practical takeaway is to work on the Window of Tolerance. The Window of Tolerance is a state of reason and emotion, where connection, engagement, and a place of mindfulness occurs. The more you stay in your Window of Tolerance, the more present you are with yourself and others around you. You are truly living! By tuning into your body and mindfulness, you may work on expanding your Window of Tolerance. Below are a few ideas to expand your tolerance:
Breath Work-Come-up with a two-syllable phrase meaningful to you, a personal mantra! Then, inhale one syllable for 3 seconds and exhale the second syllable for 6 seconds.
Pendulation-The concept suggests people are always contracting and expanding. The idea is to befriend the process. Envision something gorgeous, serene (ex: picture of the beach), then the hold in your mind’s eye something repulsive (ex: a moment of rejection). Practice contracting and expanding! In other words, life holds divine moments and other times evokes pain, sadness. Allow your nervous system to practice such moments. The idea is to learn how to move between these two states.
Beauty Hunting-The idea is to explore nature and take in moments around you. Go find your glimmers! Step outside and invite others to look for the majestic. By being in that moment with yourself and/or others, you invite fresh perspective and vision.
Tracking-By studying your day-to-day routine, you may take note of patterns and receive relief if you attend to yourself. In other words, be intentional and purposeful in your daily life and find out what triggers you. If you need to step away from an environment or a person(s), allow yourself to.
Trauma is complex and multi-faceted; there is no one size fits all experience. As you move through your journey to better mental health, reach out for more support. If you or someone else you know needs help processing trauma, reach out to the KYW team about support or express your concerns to an established, trusted health or mental health care provider. You are valuable and worth so much to the people around you to make this work a priority!
Trauma Journal Prompts
Who do you need to reach out to, in order to prioritize receiving help for trauma?
What does your window of tolerance look like with your partner, parents, kids, colleagues, etc.?
How do you need to refocus your energy and life, in order to stay in your window of tolerance?
What do you notice about your body, when you are operating outside your window of tolerance?
As you track yourself more, what adjustments need to be made?
Trauma Resources
Healing Trauma: Attachment, Mind, Body and Brain, Daniel J. Sieg
The Body Keeps the Score, Bessel A. van der Kolk
Try Softer, Aundi Kolber (Christian)
What Happened to You?: Conversations on Trauma, Resilience, and Healing, Oprah Winfrey & Bruce D. Perry
